When people cry they often apologize or get embarrassed...they shouldnt. Crying is amazing its lets us know we are alive, it lets us know we have feelings it lets us know we CARE! If a family or friend begins to cry infront of me straight away i say "Its awrite let your greets oot! Let aw your greets oot!" It hurts to hold them in its not always the letting them out that hurts its right at that point where your bottom lip goes, your swallow, your throat shudders thats the awful hard part but the crying is easy and actually feels ok.
Lately i have been crying over happy things, things that if feel an overwhelming appreciation for. Like for example i was in hospital and got out for a few hours and got ben and jerrys icecream. as i tasted the first bit on the icecream cone i began to cry then i laughed then i cried some more. That icecream tasted heavenly and i felt so lucky to be tasting it. To you that might sound like the first signs of going insane (probably is haha) but truthfully i know life can be taken from me at any minute and i treasure the smallest things that i enjoy. Until you Know your life is short you may never feel the way i feel towards things and experiences.
My second tearful time came when i got to see Billy Connolly live just the other day. As a child he was my first ever comedian i was allowed to watch. I loved how he told stories, how i became focused and drawn to them. I then grew to love his series when he traveled around the world,Australia tour, new zeland and my favourite route 66. That is why if i am lucky enough to have a transplant and be allowed to travel i would like to travel route 66. Billy captured it magically even though those diners or tourist attractions may seem minor to some they looked so appealing to me probably partly how Billy delivered it. Billy connolly makes me think of my childhood, happy christmas memories when i would receive his DVDs, trips to the carboot sale on a sunday where i would spend my pocket money on his tapes,videos and books. Or when i got my first MP3 player and i downloaded live recordings of his stand up that i could listen to in the school playground whilst laughing away to myself and knowing it word for word. I loved the fact he was a fellow celtic fan and i often seen him from afar at celtic park. So growing up i have forever been a fan as many others will be too but when i heard he was ill i kind of didnt want to make a fuss about it, I done something i never do and dismissed illness. To me Billy connolly was someone who i could escape whilst watching or listening to he made me forget about being ill and lifes worries.
Few years ago i tried to get tickets to see him but they sold out too soon. So when the opportunity came up this time i was certain i would NOT let this slip by me. This had to be ticked off my to do list. So as he walked out onto the stage through the curtain i was so shocked i could not believe he was right there. I was going to hear him tell me his stories. And i began to cry quietly. For the first 15mins i couldnt take it in not fully even listening to what he was saying. He did say when he came on "aw you are only cheering coz i am no well" haha. After that i got fully involved and was in my glory. I kept checking my phone knowing the end was nearing and he began to say his goodbyes and took a final bow. Everyone stood up and cheered and i began to cry again. I was so happy i got to see such a talented and clever man. It was a dream come true!
Its up to you how you see life....its up to you if you want to allow things to get you down but its also up to you to make a change if you are not happy...
People say life is short .... it isnt its just we waste time making the wrong choices ( Naomi MacIver)
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