I have been following the story of Haley Croppers cancer story on coronation street and i feel it bas been aired beautifully despite the fact i would not carry out a suicidal death with my illness. However i do believe each to their own.
During some of the episodes Haley would talk about the future with her not in it, i found that amusing as i do the same to friends and family and mostly do it in a humorous way. I feel i do this to show them i am not scared and that its ok and important talk about it. I do get mixed reaction just like Haley did.
Haley also decided to plan her funeral, that myself I have also done. She took Roy to the funeral parlour to discuss her wishes and Roy found this extremely difficult which is very much understandable. When i went to the funeral parlour, i went alone as i didnt want to put my loved ones through any necessary stress. And yes i did cry when i began to talk however i pulled myself together and knew what i was doing was ok. I actually got excited over some of the options available. Some people may see that as obscure, but i myself find it completely sensible as why shouldnt you have a choice over your last wishes, why should I leave it to my loved ones to struggle and ponder over. You get to plan everything else in your life or at least you SHOULD its your life so you live it as you wish. I am not saying i think all people should plan their funeral but at least make some decisions especially when you are well, it will be more clearer then. The funeral director did also shed a tear that day and said i was very brave. But i try not to live in fear,i say try as i do not always succeed.
Haley also then began saying her goodbyes, saying things like remember to wear sun cream and hats to her husband. All those important things she would say if still living a long life. I touched on myself doing such things in my previous blog post. She also spoke about how young kids in her life and how she wouldn't get to see them grow up. again this is a thought that crosses my mind often. So when she spoke during these episodes i empathised fully with her. And i was constantly reminded of the pain and hurt that mainly her husband Roy was experiencing.
The thing i learned from this story line was.....No matter how much i prepare my friends and family for a life without me in it , i cannot and will not be able to protect them from pain or grieving.
This is something i am going to have to live with and come to terms with. All i want is for them to not suffer but truthfully i cannot control this. And to see Haley passing away and the pain in Roys eyes really got to me, she done everything in her power but when she was gone he would still feel and endless amount of grief.
A very deep blog but i feel i had to express my empathy with the story line and share my own experience on the matter. What i am saying is all i can do is be there for people now. I do not know what is around the corner,i may live many years yet. However i have thought it all through and i try and do whats best for myself and everyone around me.
Peace out from
The Little One ;)
Tuesday, 21 January 2014
Monday, 9 December 2013
Organ Donation Awareness!
The past couple weeks I have been in the Sun newspaper and also my local newspaper and a few online articles sharing my story of me waiting for a transplant. It has been done to raise awareness of how important it is to discuss your wishes to your family as many healthy organs are either buried or burnt to ashes when they could be used to save many lives!
https://www.organdonationscotland.org/news-events/brave-lisa-tells-of-wait-for-life-saving-transplant
http://www.alloaadvertiser.com/news/alloa/articles/2013/11/19/479198-alloa-woman-backs-campaign-for--organ-donors/
I have had many peoples support online with what I have been doing by sharing my story and I really appreciate it! Also the headlines say "Brave" I don't know if I would call myself brave. Being brave is when you choose to do something like jumping out of a plane or capturing a spider or jumping out in front of traffic to save someone. What I am dealing with I have no choice and I am S***ING it! So in my eyes I am not brave. There are more people who can be described as brave. Sometimes when I read peoples supportive comments online/via txt or when I read the articles, I forget its about me. Like it doesn't feel like all this is happening.
Since being listed for transplant I am still finding myself getting emotional. I find it really difficult seeing what this is doing to my close friends and family.
I often get really angry as I wish I didn't have to put them through this ( even though its not my fault) I still hate seeing them hurting and seeing the worried look behind their strong eyes. I find it hard talking bout it now to my younger cousins as most of all I don't want them to worry. Nor do I want to promise all the wonderful things we could do together if I get my lungs as I don't want to break a promise incase my call never comes.
Im often finding myself telling people advice or things I feel they need to know incase I am not their to give them it in the future. I know that sounds crazy but I am trying to think logically.
I know I am staring death in the face on and off and will do so again in the future. But trying to make sure everyone around me is ok and will be if I had to pass is hard work. Mainly because once I am gone I know I cannot help them the way I could if I was here!! Feeling like this has really shown me that I am not ready to die. I have too many things to live for and too many people! It is unquestionably obvious that I don't want to die and nor am I scared. I am just not finished living yet.
https://www.organdonationscotland.org/register-now
Please sign the register to help others to keep living!
http://www.alloaadvertiser.com/news/alloa/articles/2013/11/19/479198-alloa-woman-backs-campaign-for--organ-donors/
I have had many peoples support online with what I have been doing by sharing my story and I really appreciate it! Also the headlines say "Brave" I don't know if I would call myself brave. Being brave is when you choose to do something like jumping out of a plane or capturing a spider or jumping out in front of traffic to save someone. What I am dealing with I have no choice and I am S***ING it! So in my eyes I am not brave. There are more people who can be described as brave. Sometimes when I read peoples supportive comments online/via txt or when I read the articles, I forget its about me. Like it doesn't feel like all this is happening.
Since being listed for transplant I am still finding myself getting emotional. I find it really difficult seeing what this is doing to my close friends and family.
I often get really angry as I wish I didn't have to put them through this ( even though its not my fault) I still hate seeing them hurting and seeing the worried look behind their strong eyes. I find it hard talking bout it now to my younger cousins as most of all I don't want them to worry. Nor do I want to promise all the wonderful things we could do together if I get my lungs as I don't want to break a promise incase my call never comes.
Im often finding myself telling people advice or things I feel they need to know incase I am not their to give them it in the future. I know that sounds crazy but I am trying to think logically.
I know I am staring death in the face on and off and will do so again in the future. But trying to make sure everyone around me is ok and will be if I had to pass is hard work. Mainly because once I am gone I know I cannot help them the way I could if I was here!! Feeling like this has really shown me that I am not ready to die. I have too many things to live for and too many people! It is unquestionably obvious that I don't want to die and nor am I scared. I am just not finished living yet.
https://www.organdonationscotland.org/register-now
Please sign the register to help others to keep living!
 |
Saturday, 12 October 2013
Gotta take the good with the bad!
The past few weeks havent been the best for me. I started getting a chest infection a few days after i finished oral antibiotics. And i noticed i was struggling to stay awake just this constant tired feeling. So on a Monday i decided i would go to hospital like i normally would and ask for IV antibiotics the one that i can into my blood stream through a small needle under my skin. So they gave me 2 weeks supply and i began them at home. Over the next few days i got worse before the drugs had time to work. I became very ill with chest pain everytime i coughed. Which was pretty much constantly. I could only manage to walk to the bathroom as i was so short of breath. Each day either my mum or dad was visiting me to tidy up and make me meals. It came to the Thursday and i had to have help with going in the shower as i couldnt breath well at all. My mum helped me and i just sat in the shower seat struggling to breathe whilst she washed my hair. These are the times when i have a little cry because it am under so much strain. I manged to wash myself and my mum lifted my mood by having a little laugh with me but trying to use so much effort to wash myself and breath so fast and heavy i couldnt manage to laugh. I realised i was breathing oddly like there was no rhythm it was fast then slow then in and out but i felt like i was gasping. I was also getting really bad headaches when i slept. So i would have to wake up to try to get rid of them,also if it wasnt them it was the coughing or pain i couldnt win. So the saturday came and i decided i wasnt getting better quick enough i had to go back to hospital. I got admitted and the done a blood gas which is blood taking from the artery in your wrist ( pretty painful ) and it showed i wasnt getting rid of the CO2 in my body and it was high.This high level was causing me to feel drowsy, confused, tired and have headaches. You breathe in oxygen and breathe out co2. Im lead to believe my body was needing oxygen so it starts to breathe quickly taking in alot of oxygen but not having enough time or strength to breathe it all out, causing the high CO2. So i also had to have more nebulisers and physio sessions to try clear all the thick sticky mucus in my chest that was making me feel like i was drowning on the inside. On the Monday my physio showed me a machine called Bipap. It is a machine that is a non invasive ventilator. Which means as you breathe in it senses your breath and it pushes air in along with you and you breath out normally. It feels kind of forceful and it manages to double the volume of the air in i breathe. The first night i had it on for a total of 4.5hrs which is good going for it being first time using it. Once that amount of time went past i had to ask nurse to take it off as it isnt the most comfortable thing. Whilst using it for the first night a nurse had to come in every 15mins for the first hour to measure my oxygen level,heart rate and blood pressure then every hour after that which isnt great neither when you are trying to sleep. However the next night i only managed 2 hours which wasnt good. So i was told the next day by the physio that if i want to have the CO2 levels brought down i needed to wear it longer :( .The 3rd night i wore it for 3.5hrs but woke up and had like a panic attack and ripped it off, i felt so claustrophobic.I then went to sleep till 7am and buzzed the nurse and asked if she could re-fit the mask and that i was ready to wear it some more. So i fell back asleep with it on until 10.30am . The physio was more happy with that amount of hours ;). So a doctor came and done another blood gas test and the results showed that the bipap had helped and brought my CO2 level down!! But then i had to not wear it the next night and have blood test in the morning again so they could see if it was the machine that helped bring it down or because the antibiotics were getting rid of the infection. The next blood results showed that it had went up ever so slightly so the machine did help. Fortunately i got home after being in hospital for 6days. Since then i have mainly been at home resting continuing with another week of IV antibiotics. I usually on have 2weeks of antibiotics but because it was a bad infection i had 3weeks. I also got started on insulin at night before my overnight feed that i get through a tube into my stomach. I had to have insulin roughly 6 years ago for a few weeks. Im hoping im not on insulin this time for much longer.These type of bad infections cause extra damage to my lungs which cant be fully fixed. Each infection deteriorates my lungs that one big further. I have to say i have never had an infection quite as bad as that before it was actually very scary and got me down a lot, especially when i felt i wasnt getting any better. As i know that it is common for people with Cystic Fibrosis to have a bad chest infection that can kill them and they cant recover from. So infection isnt taken lightly. Nor do i want people who are ill to come near me!
But i am pretty much back on my feet again making each day busy ones :)
The month of August - incredible 4 weeks
Just a blog post on 4 incredible weeks iv had that id like to share with you.
The reason I am sharing is to let you know how much I am living life to the fullest, grabbing those fun filled opportunities, even if I am in a wheelchair and need oxygen I wouldn't say I am having any less fun than the next person.
The first thing i done was go out after midnight with 2 friends and watch Shooting stars up the hills as there was a meteorite shower. Something i have always wanted to do and it was incredible! So pretty and exciting to see them!
The second thing I done was met Charlotte from Geordie shore again. I am a bit obsessed I think haha. She came to my local night club Fubar. I think I like her so much because I see myself in her. I chatted to her and she could remember meeting me back in January at City nightclub which was nice. Was a quick minute convo about being on transplant list and she wished me luck. Just that short minute was amazing to me! Sad but true!
The next thing I done this month was go to my big cousins wedding. She looked stunning in her dress. The wedding ceremony was so beautiful to watch and I cried a few times. To witness love so pure was very touching and it was an honour to be there. The meal afterwards was lovely and I really enjoyed it. And the entertainment at night a live band then at 10pm a live pipe band out in the garden with a highland dancer was a brilliant surprise. A very traditional Scottish wedding that couldn't have went better.
The next day I went to Bellahouston Park in Glasgow to see GBX, my fave DJ Steve Aoki, Tinie Tempah and then Avicci. The weather was pretty good just one little shower. My Steve Aoki came on and I screamed with excitement I just love his tunes. Inmy opinion he is the best because every other DJ just stands at decs and plays tracks, he pours champagne over people, has a blow up boat that he jumps in and crowd surfs or gets audience members to jump in. And also my favourite thing is he "Cakes people" it is his signature thing. He is from Miami and sometimes does upto 3 gigs a day over different places around the world. He has his private jet which makes getting around easier. Many people world wide want caked by him. There was once a guy who got caked in his wheelchair as he was being crowd surfed in it, pretty crazy so I joked that I would crowd surf in mine and get caked at this gig. However I never :P. Tinie Tempah put on a great performance and I forgot how many hit songs he has had. My best friend Louise loved it and was great to see her having a great time. And lastly was Avicci DJ and he put on a pretty good show too.
The next gig a few days later was Eminem. I had been wanting to see him in concert since i was in primary school. I have heard bad stories about him miming and not turning up to performances. But he was sensational and i enjoyed rapping along to all his songs! Luckily we got the wheelchair viewing platform again so got to see a great view.
A few days later after that and it was my weekend away to Cheshire to the creamfields festival with my big cousin Aimee and my best friend Jamie. We had been looking forward to this for months. It is a dance festival with DJs pretty much like TITP but just dance music. I got my case packed, picked up Aimee then Jamie and we were off. A long 4 hour journey that involved constant singing, banter and educating Jamie on Woman haha! We arrived at our travel-lodge and the room was perfect for our 3 night stay. Double bed and a wee camp bed for Jamie haha! Jamie fell asleep first and i tried to draw on him but my LOUD laughing didnt help and he woke up. Before heading out next day we filled out caprisun pouches with our alcohol and stashed them in the wheelchair ;) We went to a Morissons for brunch first. When we got there it was such a sunny day however Jamie realised he had left his hoodie at Morissons but luckily we would pick it up during brunch the next day. The place was amazing tents and stages were playing the most amazing music. We knew this weekend was going to be great! What i did notice was everyone kept coming up to me to shake my hand or high five me in my wheelchair...you would have thought i was a celeb. They were just thinking it was cool i was at a dance festival in a wheelchair. I even got a nice kiss from a cute guy, being in a wheelchair aint that bad nor does it me back from anything!The only downside from being a wheelchair was my best friend and cousins having to push me for 2 days around a field. Which they done so well and if it wasnt for them i wouldnt have been able to go! The vodka also went down great that day i was ever so tipsy. The next day i didnt drink but Jamie did so i had the job of driving to and from the gig. Fairs fair! On the sunday i had decided i was going to get front row for my Fave DJ Steve Aoki that i had previously chatted about up there ^^^. I managed to edge my way in to the front row with my wheelchair pressed right against the barrier. Not long after he had been on stage he noticed me and threw me water making sure i was ok! I raved away in my wheelchair stretching my hand over the barrier.
Well they are some pictures that show you the extent of the cake mess. Also there is a picture with the celebrity Chelsee Healey who we met. She is known for Waterloo Road and being on Strictly Come Dancing.
All in all Creamfields was amazing and i cant wait to go back. I just cant wait for the time i go with no wheelchair and i can rave for a full 12hours! The DJS wont know whats hit them!
The reason I am sharing is to let you know how much I am living life to the fullest, grabbing those fun filled opportunities, even if I am in a wheelchair and need oxygen I wouldn't say I am having any less fun than the next person.
The first thing i done was go out after midnight with 2 friends and watch Shooting stars up the hills as there was a meteorite shower. Something i have always wanted to do and it was incredible! So pretty and exciting to see them!
The next thing I done this month was go to my big cousins wedding. She looked stunning in her dress. The wedding ceremony was so beautiful to watch and I cried a few times. To witness love so pure was very touching and it was an honour to be there. The meal afterwards was lovely and I really enjoyed it. And the entertainment at night a live band then at 10pm a live pipe band out in the garden with a highland dancer was a brilliant surprise. A very traditional Scottish wedding that couldn't have went better.
The next day I went to Bellahouston Park in Glasgow to see GBX, my fave DJ Steve Aoki, Tinie Tempah and then Avicci. The weather was pretty good just one little shower. My Steve Aoki came on and I screamed with excitement I just love his tunes. Inmy opinion he is the best because every other DJ just stands at decs and plays tracks, he pours champagne over people, has a blow up boat that he jumps in and crowd surfs or gets audience members to jump in. And also my favourite thing is he "Cakes people" it is his signature thing. He is from Miami and sometimes does upto 3 gigs a day over different places around the world. He has his private jet which makes getting around easier. Many people world wide want caked by him. There was once a guy who got caked in his wheelchair as he was being crowd surfed in it, pretty crazy so I joked that I would crowd surf in mine and get caked at this gig. However I never :P. Tinie Tempah put on a great performance and I forgot how many hit songs he has had. My best friend Louise loved it and was great to see her having a great time. And lastly was Avicci DJ and he put on a pretty good show too.
The next gig a few days later was Eminem. I had been wanting to see him in concert since i was in primary school. I have heard bad stories about him miming and not turning up to performances. But he was sensational and i enjoyed rapping along to all his songs! Luckily we got the wheelchair viewing platform again so got to see a great view.
A few days later after that and it was my weekend away to Cheshire to the creamfields festival with my big cousin Aimee and my best friend Jamie. We had been looking forward to this for months. It is a dance festival with DJs pretty much like TITP but just dance music. I got my case packed, picked up Aimee then Jamie and we were off. A long 4 hour journey that involved constant singing, banter and educating Jamie on Woman haha! We arrived at our travel-lodge and the room was perfect for our 3 night stay. Double bed and a wee camp bed for Jamie haha! Jamie fell asleep first and i tried to draw on him but my LOUD laughing didnt help and he woke up. Before heading out next day we filled out caprisun pouches with our alcohol and stashed them in the wheelchair ;) We went to a Morissons for brunch first. When we got there it was such a sunny day however Jamie realised he had left his hoodie at Morissons but luckily we would pick it up during brunch the next day. The place was amazing tents and stages were playing the most amazing music. We knew this weekend was going to be great! What i did notice was everyone kept coming up to me to shake my hand or high five me in my wheelchair...you would have thought i was a celeb. They were just thinking it was cool i was at a dance festival in a wheelchair. I even got a nice kiss from a cute guy, being in a wheelchair aint that bad nor does it me back from anything!The only downside from being a wheelchair was my best friend and cousins having to push me for 2 days around a field. Which they done so well and if it wasnt for them i wouldnt have been able to go! The vodka also went down great that day i was ever so tipsy. The next day i didnt drink but Jamie did so i had the job of driving to and from the gig. Fairs fair! On the sunday i had decided i was going to get front row for my Fave DJ Steve Aoki that i had previously chatted about up there ^^^. I managed to edge my way in to the front row with my wheelchair pressed right against the barrier. Not long after he had been on stage he noticed me and threw me water making sure i was ok! I raved away in my wheelchair stretching my hand over the barrier.
You can see in these pictures. Like is said previously Steve the DJ likes to through cakes on peoples faces so each time he borught a cake people were pointing at me and i wanted to be caked so bad. On the last cake he walked straight over to me and stood above my wheelchair and said "Are you sure?" and i said yeaaahh cake me! So he threw the most heaviest cake right onto my face. The crowd went crazy and everyone washing pushing forward. The cake was EVERYWHERE!! in my hair, my eyelashes, my ears, in my top, all over my seat in the handle grooves. It smelt and tastes awesome! Steve then stood over the barrier and asked if i was ok! I stood up and hugged him and said "I LOVE YOU" and he said "I LOVE YOU TOO" in his american accent. He made a young girl very happy. Such a great guy!So i left the tent and i was buzzing and fans of his were coming over and high fiving me saying "YOU GOT CAKED BY STEVE AOKI!!!" and im like "YEEAAAAHHHH" haha. Jamie just kept saying "I KNEW IT, i knew he was going to cake you i knew it i knew it!. So i feel very lucky to be some of the few to be caked by him as world wide people want that to happen to them. Such harmless fun that is so entertaining. Then we sat and watched AfroJack, LikeMike and Dimitri Vegas then David Guetta. The stage lightening and flames are some i have never seen before they were so impressive. And the fireworks at the end of the night were phenomenal. There were fireworks at our stage and the south stage going off. I must say i have been to TITP in Scotland a couple times but never have i seen a place so friendly and have better effects and standards here. The rides, the foods, the amount of stages.
Well they are some pictures that show you the extent of the cake mess. Also there is a picture with the celebrity Chelsee Healey who we met. She is known for Waterloo Road and being on Strictly Come Dancing.
All in all Creamfields was amazing and i cant wait to go back. I just cant wait for the time i go with no wheelchair and i can rave for a full 12hours! The DJS wont know whats hit them!
Friday, 12 July 2013
Football game and A waiting game...
Well at the football i raised a further £900 for my parents. The football was a great day out. It stayed dry i had 30 guys turn up to play. Help from friends with a sound system which i played funny songs after each person scored. Everyone had a really good time. Afterwards we went to the old brewery for some food and drinks which was lovely to see lots of people come along to that too!
I also had a call from Lornshill Academy to say they had £500 cheque for my family and I. My mum and I went to pick it up and get a tour around new school. I asked to see my guidance teacher Miss Dodds and it brought a lot of great memories back. We met in the corridor and it brought me to tears instantly. Doddsy was a great help and a friend throughout my highschool years. She would always listen to me and have great banter with. The reason i cried was kind of like i was so happy to see her but also sad as to go back to my youth when things were more simpler would be great. I also kinda felt bad that she hadnt seen me in years but was now seeing me with my oxygen on and showing signs that i have deteriorated. You never want people to see you like that. When returning home that day i then received another phone call from Lornshill this time the P.E department to say the money they raised at their sportathon to us which was a further £500. I was so overwhelmed for them to still want to donate more and to think of me. They said they couldnt think of anyone more that they would want to give it to.
I also have friends who live outwith Scotland who couldnt make my events who have requested ways to donate money. So i set up a page where they could donate and so far i have raised £80 from that so right now we are just over the £4000 mark.
This means so much to us. If my mum and dad stay in a b&b for the duration of my recovery 4weeks+ you are talking £40 a night. Then food and petrol each day. If there happens to be any money left over from the operation stay then i will use it for my future trips and hospital stays to Newcastle :) as i will have clinic regularly and will get treated there if i have any after operation complications.
Just thought i would write a bit about how i am feeling since i have been listed.
Its kind of strange as i actually feel like iv just started living , like meeting up with friends, visiting people i get butterflies as its so amazing, i see days out in a totally different light! It feels as though i have just become alive despite being at my most ill point.
I have so much positivity but at the same time so much fear....its a strange feeling. I keep fearing that i am not organised enough for it ....or how can i prepare my mum and dad. When i am having the operation will my mum and dad be coping in the waiting room while im under going 12 hour surgery. What if it takes ages for me to come off the breathing machines.
Theres still a few things i havent packed and sorted out, its so hard to get them things sorted when you are trying to live your life to the fullest,keep as well as possible, organising concerts and festivals your going to,trips out with friends haha!
I also had a call from Lornshill Academy to say they had £500 cheque for my family and I. My mum and I went to pick it up and get a tour around new school. I asked to see my guidance teacher Miss Dodds and it brought a lot of great memories back. We met in the corridor and it brought me to tears instantly. Doddsy was a great help and a friend throughout my highschool years. She would always listen to me and have great banter with. The reason i cried was kind of like i was so happy to see her but also sad as to go back to my youth when things were more simpler would be great. I also kinda felt bad that she hadnt seen me in years but was now seeing me with my oxygen on and showing signs that i have deteriorated. You never want people to see you like that. When returning home that day i then received another phone call from Lornshill this time the P.E department to say the money they raised at their sportathon to us which was a further £500. I was so overwhelmed for them to still want to donate more and to think of me. They said they couldnt think of anyone more that they would want to give it to.
I also have friends who live outwith Scotland who couldnt make my events who have requested ways to donate money. So i set up a page where they could donate and so far i have raised £80 from that so right now we are just over the £4000 mark.
This means so much to us. If my mum and dad stay in a b&b for the duration of my recovery 4weeks+ you are talking £40 a night. Then food and petrol each day. If there happens to be any money left over from the operation stay then i will use it for my future trips and hospital stays to Newcastle :) as i will have clinic regularly and will get treated there if i have any after operation complications.
Just thought i would write a bit about how i am feeling since i have been listed.
Its kind of strange as i actually feel like iv just started living , like meeting up with friends, visiting people i get butterflies as its so amazing, i see days out in a totally different light! It feels as though i have just become alive despite being at my most ill point.
I have so much positivity but at the same time so much fear....its a strange feeling. I keep fearing that i am not organised enough for it ....or how can i prepare my mum and dad. When i am having the operation will my mum and dad be coping in the waiting room while im under going 12 hour surgery. What if it takes ages for me to come off the breathing machines.
Theres still a few things i havent packed and sorted out, its so hard to get them things sorted when you are trying to live your life to the fullest,keep as well as possible, organising concerts and festivals your going to,trips out with friends haha!
I hope to be able to wear a tshirt like this one day.
I hope you have discussed with your family your wishes about organ donation.
Thursday, 13 June 2013
After Race Night!
Hi everyone, so its 1 week since iv been on waiting list. Had my first dream that i had had the call and i was down in Newcastle about to receive my new lungs...was a pretty scary dream.
Just writing to update you on how my Race Night went. It was a total success! So far we have raised £2070 that is from the race night and a few donations people have given to me too. Since totaling that up i have still had more donations given. I am so over whelmed at everyone's support for my family and I. Knowing that when the time comes my mum and dad can focus on me and not if they can comfortable stay in Newcastle really helps take the worry and pressure off my shoulders. I will be in the local paper again next week to give an update on the Race Night and to talk about the Football game that is happening on the 23rd of June.
Everyone said my speech at the Race Night was well given and i hope so too, i am glad i never got upset when doing it. However as the night went on and people were saying their good byes to me and wishing me luck i began to get a lump in my throat because knowing how much people really care and that i dont want to let anyone down. Also the vodkas didnt help the emotions lol.
So i have bought my suitcase that i still have to pack for when i get the call and i have arranged a meeting to discuss what i would like if and when the time comes for my funeral. Would hate to leave all of that sort of thing to my parents , would be a lot easier for everyone if it was pretty much all taken care of. So....so far so good!
You will hear from me after the football event!
Peace!
Just writing to update you on how my Race Night went. It was a total success! So far we have raised £2070 that is from the race night and a few donations people have given to me too. Since totaling that up i have still had more donations given. I am so over whelmed at everyone's support for my family and I. Knowing that when the time comes my mum and dad can focus on me and not if they can comfortable stay in Newcastle really helps take the worry and pressure off my shoulders. I will be in the local paper again next week to give an update on the Race Night and to talk about the Football game that is happening on the 23rd of June.
Everyone said my speech at the Race Night was well given and i hope so too, i am glad i never got upset when doing it. However as the night went on and people were saying their good byes to me and wishing me luck i began to get a lump in my throat because knowing how much people really care and that i dont want to let anyone down. Also the vodkas didnt help the emotions lol.
So i have bought my suitcase that i still have to pack for when i get the call and i have arranged a meeting to discuss what i would like if and when the time comes for my funeral. Would hate to leave all of that sort of thing to my parents , would be a lot easier for everyone if it was pretty much all taken care of. So....so far so good!
You will hear from me after the football event!
Peace!
Wednesday, 5 June 2013
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